3600+ Toxic Captions For Instagram (2023) Ex, Savage, Short

Instagram can be a great place to share your photos and connect with friends, but it can also be a toxic wasteland of negativity. If you're looking for toxic captions, you've come to the right place! We've got all the best insults and put-downs for you to use on your next post. So fire up your phone and get ready to unleash some verbal venom!

Toxic captions for Instagram are mean, hurtful, and insulting. Efficiently communicating your contempt for someone in just a few words is an art form, and we've collected some of the best examples for you to use. Whether you're trying to get under someone's skin or just want to make them feel bad, these captions will do the trick!

We all have days where we just need to let off some steam, and what better way to do that than by insulting someone anonymously? Toxic captions can be a great way to blow off steam and maybe even make someone else's day a little worse. Go ahead, keep scrolling and find the perfect toxic Instagram captions.

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Funny Toxic Captions For Instagram (2023)

Determining whether or not something is funny is subjective, so you might not think these funny, toxic captions for Instagram are funny. But that's okay because they're meant to be tongue-in-cheek and sarcastic.

A closer inspection will reveal that these captions are pretty clever. If you're looking for some funny toxic captions for Instagram, here are some examples:

• I'm not a morning person, but I'll make an exception for you.
• I'm sorry, did I hurt your feelings? I meant to do that.
• You're like a disease, and I am the cure.
• We all know what you're thinking, so save us the trouble and stay quiet.
• I'm not a fan of you, but I'm a fan of your hatred for me.
• You're so fake that even China can't knock off your copy.
• Don't worry; I forgot you existed long before you did.
• I hope one day you'll realize how much I don't care about you.
• I'm not saying I hate you, but if you were on fire and I had a bucket of water, I'd probably just watch you burn.
• Positivity is overrated. I much prefer negativity.
• I'm not saying I don't like you, but I wouldn't run after you if zombies were chasing you.
• Oops, I must have accidentally liked one of your posts. My bad.
• I'm not saying I don't care, but you should be used to disappointment at this point.
• You're so annoying that even mosquitoes won't bite you.
• Ugh, I just realized that you're still breathing.
• I'm not mad; I'm just disappointed that you turned out to be everything I knew you would be.
• You're like a broken pencil: pointless and useless.
• Trying to understand you is like trying to smell the color nine.
• I'm not saying I hate you, but I wouldn't cry if you got hit by a bus.
• I don't know your problem, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
• If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on Earth.
• I'm not saying you're stupid, but it takes a long time to think of a silly thing to say.
• Hate is such a strong word. I prefer to call it intense dislike.
• You have the perfect face for radio.
• I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.
• You might be wise if your brain were as big as your mouth.
• Gossip is just a tool to make mediocre people feel essential.
• Fool me once; shame on you. Fool me twice, and I'll fool you right back.
• Dumb people are like parking spots: all the good ones are taken, and the rest are handicapped.
• Mental illness is just a socially acceptable way of saying you're crazy.
• Narcissism: because everything is all about you.
• You're like a penny: two-faced and not worth very much.
• Bless your heart and every other body part you're lacking.
• Karma's just a bitch. I'm more of a bastard.
• I'm not saying I don't like you, but if you were on fire and I had a bucket of water, I'd probably just drink it.
• Eating disorders are severe; you should try one.
• I'm not saying you're ugly, but your face could scare small children.
• Worry less about your appearance and more about being a decent human being.
• I'm not saying you're fat, but it looks like someone drew on you with a permanent marker.
• Q: Why don't you like me? A: Because you're a terrible person.
• Laughing at you is like watching a train wreck: I can't look away.
• Roses are red; violets are blue; I have five fingers, and the middle one is for you.
• I'm not saying I don't like you, but if a serial killer broke into my house, I would probably tell them where to find you first.
• You're so ugly that the rats start screaming when you walk into a room.
• Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.
• I'm sorry for what I said when we were fighting. I was wrong... you're still an idiot.
• I'm not saying I hate you, but if you were a triangle, you'd be acute.
• I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed that you're not who I thought you were.
• You're like the sun... annoying and unbearable.

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Toxic Instagram Captions For Ex (2023)

It can be tough going through a breakup, especially if it wasn't your decision. You might find yourself feeling angry, hurt, and alone. At this stage, you want to blast your thoughts all over social media for the world to see.

You need some good lines for your Instagram caption to get all of those feels out, but also make sure your ex sees it. Using captions like these will make your ex realize what they're missing out on. Here are some great toxic Instagram captions for ex:

• I'm not perfect, I make mistakes, and I hurt people. But when I say sorry, I mean it.
• You can't keep playing with my heart and expect me to be okay with it.
• I don't need you. I'm better off without you.
• Roses are red, and violets are blue. I hope you realize what an idiot you're being.
• I'm not mad. I'm just disappointed you turned into everything you said you'd never be.
• Walking away from you was the best decision I ever made.
• It's better to be alone than to be with someone who doesn't appreciate you.
• I don't regret you, I regret the time I spent with someone who wasn't worth it.
• I'm not perfect, but I'm worth it. You're not, and you never will be.
• You can't keep treating me like this and expect me to stick around.
• I don't regret anything, because at one point it was exactly what I wanted.
• I'm not bitter. I'm just not desperate enough to put up with your crap anymore.
• Messing with me is a bad idea. You don't want to see me when I'm angry.
• You're not worth my time, my energy, or my love.
• I'm done chasing you. You can come back when you're ready to be chased.
• Vulnerability is not a weakness. It takes more strength to be open than it does to put up walls.
• Jealousy is a disease. Get well soon.
• Reality check: you're not as great as you think you are.
• I don't need your drama in my life. I'm better off without it.
• You're toxic, and I'm done being poisoned by you.
• Ohh, you're leaving? Good. I didn't want you here anyway.
• Shut your mouth when you're talking to me. I'm not interested in hearing your lies.
• Go on and keep playing games. I'll be over here winning mine.
• I don't need your negativity in my life. I'm better off without it.
• You're toxic, and I need to get away from you before you ruin my life.
• I thought you were different. I guess I was wrong.
• Karma's a bitch, and I hope she bites you in the ass.
• You hurt me more than I ever thought possible. And I hope it was worth it.
• You were never good enough for me.
• I hope you find someone who treats you the way you deserve...but it won't be me.
• Picking up the pieces of my broken heart that you left behind.
• Oops, I forgot you existed.
• I'm not mad. I'm just glad I found out what kind of person you are before it was too late.
• It's over. And this time, I'm done with you.
• We're not friends, we're not enemies. We're just strangers with some memories.
• Ugh, I can't believe I ever even liked you.
• Yup, definitely over you.
• I don't hate you, I just…don't care about you.
• At least now I know better than to waste my time on someone like you.
• Trying to forget you is like trying to remember someone I never met.

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Toxic Instagram Captions For Guys (2023)

As the world knows guys are the most toxic people on Instagram. They are the ones who post picture-perfect photos with arrogant and sexist captions. But coming up with these captions is not easy. It takes a lot of time and effort to be this toxic.

But don't worry guys when we are here to help you. We have compiled a list of toxic Instagram captions for you to use. Here is the list of some toxic Instagram captions for guys.

• I don't need a filter, because I'm already perfect.
• If you don't like my Instagram photos, you can unfollow me.
• I'm not here to impress you, I'm here to express myself.
• My life is better than yours, so deal with it.
• I'm not a player, I just crush a lot.
• I'm the king of my own castle.
• Gentlemen prefer blondes but they will settle for anything with a pulse.
• Empire state of mind.
• I'm living the life most people only dream of.
• Treat me like a king and I'll treat you like a queen. Treat me like a game and I'll show you how it's played.
• I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it hurts.
• Pics or it didn't happen.
• I'm not perfect but I'm a limited edition.
• I'm the reason girls fall in love with Jerks.
• I'm pretty but I'm not available.
• Mondays are for fresh starts.
• No new friends.
• I'm an acquired taste. Like a fine wine, you'll get better with age.
• No matter how hot she is, someone somewhere is sick and tired of her crap.
• A lady in the street but a freak in the bed.
• A guy is as much toxic as he is handsome.
• I'm bad, I'm better than the best.
• I'm the hottest thing in town and you can have me if you're down for a little trouble.
• Ugly people need love too, but they have to pay for it.
• I'm not just a pretty face, I'm also a great catch.
• I'm the total package: looks, brains, and personality.
• Ugly girls try harder.
• I'm the life of the party, even when I'm not there.
• My attitude is based on how you treat me.

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Toxic Relationship Captions For Instagram (2023)

Toxic relations can be found in every corner of social media. From the couple who can't stop arguing in their Instagram comments to the friend who constantly likes your ex's photos, these toxic people are everywhere.

Somehow, we always seem to find ourselves in these toxic relationships. And when we're in them, it can be hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But there is always a way out. If you're currently in a toxic relationship, here are some toxic relationship captions for Instagram that will help you get through it:

• Toxic relations are like a cloud that darkens your day.
• Toxic relations are like cancer that slowly eats away at your soul.
• Absorbing someone else's toxicity is like drinking poison.
• Mental and emotional abuse is just as toxic as physical abuse.
• A toxic relationship will leave you feeling drained, exhausted, and empty.
• Toxic people are like leeches; they will suck the life out of you if you let them.
• Growth is impossible in a toxic environment.
• A toxic relationship is not worth your time, energy, or sanity.
• Falling out of love is a sign that it was never real love, to begin with.
• Toxic people will try to control you, manipulate you, and gaslight you.
• You deserve so much better than a toxic relationship.
• A toxic relationship is one where you're not allowed to be yourself.
• Toxic people will try to make you feel like you're not good enough, smart enough, or worthy of their time.
• Dealing with a toxic person is like playing a never-ending game of chess.
• Gossip, drama and manipulation are all red flags of a toxic relationship.
• In a toxic relationship, you're always walking on eggshells.
• Yin and yang. Oil and water. Toxicity and happiness can never mix.
• A toxic relationship is like being stuck in quicksand. The more you struggle, the deeper you sink.
• Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
• Toxic people will do everything they can to bring you down to their level.
• A toxic person is someone who brings more drama than happiness into your life.
• A toxic relationship is one that's based on jealousy, insecurity, and control.
• Toxic people are like black holes. They suck all the joy and light out of your life.
• Toxic relations are full of drama and pain.
• Affordability is important, but it's not worth sacrificing your happiness.
• Steady yourself for the journey ahead. You're about to embark on the road to recovery from a toxic relationship.
• Elaborately constructed lies are the foundation of a toxic relationship.
• A toxic relationship is like being in prison.
• In a toxic relationship, love is replaced by control.
• Toxic relations are built on a cycle of abuse.
• A toxic relationship is full of secrets and betrayal.
• Pretending everything is okay is how a toxic relationship survives.
• Oblivious to the toxicity, we often stay in toxic relationships longer than we should.
• Ugly arguments are a common occurrence in toxic relationships.
• Toxic people will do everything they can to drag you down with them.
• There's always hope for a way out of a toxic relationship.
• Yelling, screaming, and name-calling are all signs of a toxic relationship.
• Toxic relations are never equal. There's always one person who has the power.
• In a toxic relationship, love is replaced by fear.

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Savage Toxic Captions For Instagram (2023)

Savage, toxic captions for Instagram are perfect for those times when you just want to post a photo of yourself looking amazing and let your haters know that you don't care what they think.

Ordinarily, these types of captions would be considered arrogant and cocky. But when they're done right, they can be empowering and motivating. If you're looking for some savage toxic captions for Instagram, here are some examples:

• I'm not perfect, I make mistakes, but I'm not afraid to admit them.
• I'm not here to please you, I'm here to express myself.
• Satisfactory is the biggest enemy of excellence.
• Don't be fooled by my smile, I can be a savage when I need to be.
• Besides, I'm too busy living my life to worry about what you think of me.
• Detecting your insecurity is my hobby.
• Existing is too mainstream for me.
• Haters will say I'm arrogant, but the truth is I just don't care what they think.
• I'm not here to make friends, I'm here to be fabulous.
• I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I thought you already knew.
• Positivity is for people who don't know how to be realists.
• I'm too blessed to be stressed.
• Opinions are like buttholes, everyone has one and they all stink.
• I'm not a people pleaser, I'm a people person.
• Determine your priorities and focus on them. Everything else is a distraction.
• I'm not interested in your approval, I'm interested in your admiration.
• Offensive? Maybe. But at least I'm not boring.
• Be as toxic as you want, just know I'm more toxic.
• Efficiently managing my time so I can continue to be lazy.
• I'm not here to fit into your world, I'm here to create my own.
• Bumble around with bees long enough, you're bound to get stung.
• I'm not an option, I'm a requirement.
• You can't keep up with me because I'm not where you left me.
• Certain people are like clouds. When they go away, it's a beautiful day.
• Drop the zero and get with the hero.
• Ugly truths are better than pretty lies.
• Roses are red, violets are blue, God made me pretty, but what the hell happened to you?
• I'm not afraid of anything that could happen to me. I'm afraid of things that could happen to you.
• If karma doesn't hit you, I gladly will.
• Y'all need Jesus, I'm just here for the snacks.
• Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere.
• F*ck what you think, this is me.
• I'm not an angel, but I'm not a devil either. I'm just a human being with flaws and qualities that make me unique.
• I don't need your approval to be happy.
• Jealousy is just a sign of insecurity.
• Don't come for me unless I send for you.
• Karma is a bitch, but I'm a bigger one.

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Short Toxic Captions For Instagram (2023)

Short toxic captions for Instagram are perfect for when you want to make a statement without saying too much. Somehow, these short captions can say more than a long paragraph ever could.

Getting your point across shortly and sweetly is an art form, but it can be mastered with practice. If you're looking for some short toxic Instagram captions, here are some examples:

• I'm not bossy, I'm the boss.
• I'm starting to like myself.
• I'm not a bitch, I'm just brutally honest.
• I'm the queen of my own little world.
• Too glam to give a damn.
• I'm sorry for being so fabulous.
• Toxic people will suck the life out of you if you let them.
• Don't be fooled by a toxic person's fake facade.
• Toxic people will do anything to control you.
• Beware of toxic people who try to make you feel guilty.
• Never let a toxic person rent space in your head.
• Loving yourself is the best defence against toxic people.
• Beware of false friends who are actually toxic people.
• I'm not perfect, but I'm worth it.
• Opinions are like buttholes, everyone has one.
• I'm sorry for what I said when I was hungry.
• I'm not really rude, I just speak the truth.
• Ugly truth > pretty lie.
• Karma's just a bitch.
• Pardon my French, but I'm fabulous.
• I'm a hot mess and I know it.
• I'm not a bitch, I'm the boss.
• I'm not mean, I'm just brutally honest.
• If you don't like me, that's your problem, not mine.

Also Check: Fire Captions For Instagram (2023)

Toxic Instagram Captions For Girls (2023)

Girls are strong and capable of anything, and these toxic Instagram captions will help you show the world just how tough you are. Either you're going to get hurt or you're going to hurt someone else, so you might as well just do what feels right.

Toxic Instagram captions for girls are the perfect way to show the world that you don't care what anyone thinks of you. You're strong and independent, and you can handle anything that comes your way. If you're looking for some toxic Instagram captions for girls, here are some examples:

• "You're worth it, and don't forget it."I'm a girl with fire in her soul and ice in her heart.
• I'm not here to be liked, I'm here to be respected.
• I'm not a damsel in distress, I'm the dragon that needs to be slain.
• I'm not afraid of being alone, I'm afraid of being surrounded by people who don't understand me.
• I'm too much for some people and just enough for others.
• Pretending to be someone you're not is exhausting, so just be yourself.
• You can't control me, I'm my own person.
• I'm not perfect, but I'm perfectly me.
• What other people think of me is none of my business.
• I'm not here to please you, I'm here to live my life the way I want to.
• You can't keep me down, I'm a fighter.
• I'm not afraid to be different, I'm afraid to be the same as everyone else.
• My life is my own and I'll live it the way I want to.
• I don't need your approval, I have my own.
• Trying to be someone you're not is a waste of time, so just be yourself.
• Risking everything for what you want is better than living a life of regret.
• Don't be afraid to be yourself, even if that means being alone.
• Rocking the boat is better than being bored to death.
• Eccentricity is better than conformity.
• Walking your path is better than following someone else's.
• I'm not here to fit into your mould, I'm here to break it.
• I'm not a princess, I'm a boss.
• I don't care what you think of me, I know who I am.
• Livin' life on my own terms.
• The only approval I need is my own.
• Killing them with kindness is overrated, I prefer killing them with success.
• I'm not a people pleaser, I'm a self-pleaser.
• I'm not here to make friends, I'm here to make an impact.
• Jealousy is just a sign of insecurity, so don't be jealous of me.
• Haters are just people who are afraid of my power.
• I'm not a role model, I'm a real model.
• Don't compare me to other people, I'm in a league of my own.
• I don't need your validation, I have my own.
• Faking it 'til you make it is overrated, I prefer just making it.
• Either I'm going to get hurt or I'm going to hurt someone else, so I might as well just do what I want.

Check More: Cute Instagram Captions For Girls (2023)

Toxic Instagram Captions For Friends (2023)

Toxic Instagram captions for friends are perfect for when you want to show your followers that you're not afraid to call out your toxic friends. We all have them, those so-called "friends" who are nothing but drama and pain.

But just because they're toxic doesn't mean you have to put up with their crap. If you're done with their drama, here are some toxic Instagram captions for friends that you can use:

• Roses are red, violets are blue, I hope your next friend is better than you.
• A toxic friend is like a leech, they suck the life out of you.
• Toxic friends are like cancer, they spread and destroy everything around them.
• I don't need toxic friends in my life, I have enough drama of my own.
• Eliminate the toxic people in your life, and watch how much better you feel.
• Walking away from toxic friends is hard, but staying is harder.
• Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get away from her toxic friend.
• I don't need toxic friends, I have a box of wine and Netflix.
• Saying goodbye to a toxic friend is like getting rid of cancer. It's painful but so worth it in the end.
• Drama is fun until you realize that you're the one being drama-ted.
• Laughter is the best medicine, unless you're around a toxic friend, then it's just awkward.
• A toxic friendship is like having food poisoning, it's not fun and you just want it to end.
• Karma is a bitch, and she always gets her toxic friends in the end.
• Toxic friends are like black holes, they suck all the happiness out of your life.
• I'm not perfect, but I'm also not a toxic friend.
• I'm surrounded by toxic people, and I'm done with all of them.
• Toxic friends are like cancer, they'll eventually kill you.
• If you're toxic, stay away from me.
• I don't have time for toxic friends.
• I don't need your toxicity in my life.
• Yours is a toxic friendship, and I'm done with it.
• Positivity only, toxic friends need not apply.
• Oops, I forgot I don't care about you anymore.
• Toxic friends are not welcome in my life.
• I'm done with your drama, I'm done with your lies, and I'm done with you.
• I'm not going to let your toxicity bring me down.
• I'm better off without you.
• Positivity is the only thing I'm interested in.
• Your drama is not welcome here.
• I don't have time for your BS.
• I'm not going to let you bring me down.
• You're not worth my time or energy.

Also Useful: Best Friend Captions For Instagram (2023)

Final Words

So, these were some of the best toxic captions for Instagram that you can use to make your profile more attractive and interesting. We hope that you found this article helpful and informative. If so, then do share it with your friends and loved ones.

Also, don't forget to tell us which caption you liked the most in the comments section below. Thank you for reading!